Sexual drive: A game with no winners

Sex drive deals with aggressiveness. A very aggressive mind will use sex as a preferred channel for aggression. There is a research here: http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2008-12/uom-uom120808.php by Univ. of Minnesota researcher V. Gliskevicius. Although it appears as human nature is aggressive “from the beginning of time” and that sex is all about passing genes and “getting the girl” as the researcher points out, the assumption is that human beings are aggressive. On the contrary, when meditation is practiced as a tool to learn about the mind, we will find out that our mind which controls human beings, strive for peace. This is one of the downsides of research. The so called “normal guy” or “Joe average” is considered as a sample for a research. Obviously, the tendency then is to generalize to “all human beings are aggressive by nature.”
A person who studies his/her own mind will discover that sex means a mental reaction to something which is viewed as desirable. “I want to get him/her. I want to posses him/her” is the phrase that summarizes this.
Without looking at how my own mind works, I have no chance to survive in an oversexed society such as ours. I will be influenced by osmosis. Aggression is part of that society as well.
A peaceful mind, on the other hand will be able to recognize how a mind could be reactive and stop or transform that reaction into something positive or good.
So I was told that “8 hours of sleep” are necessary to function. Do you consider yourself “Joe average”? Aren’t you able to explore yourself and see your own limits? The unconscious mind tendency to fantasize will show its troubles when we oversleep. Everything we have learned about us, is what others have told us. Even if I have a feeling about something which I would like to call “my own feeling” that is interpreted in light of someone else’s experience which could explain my own experience. Once I place a label to my own experience, I feel that I “know it.”
The same phenomenon occurs with the understanding of sex drive. It is easier to accept and indulge in something referred as “normal” than to be by yourself researching and experimenting with it.
Watch your own mind. See its thoughts. Observe where your energy of thoughts goes. Learn to identify aggressiveness, lust and anger within yourself. See what is the trigger and understand why that is a trigger. Yes, this requires time and willingness. This is not a matter of a pill to do it for you.
Perhaps you will find that when your mind feels unfulfilled, sex comes up. When you feel bored, sexual thoughts show up. When there is a need for a change, again something related with sex will be there for that added “newness.” This becomes a disease because I have no control over it. Until I learn and experience peace of mind. Then I see that a fulfilled mind is not searching for bodily experiences. When there is the experience of nurturing emotions such as love and care, the so called “normal” sex drive will greatly diminish.
Unfortunately, most are looking to be just average. It is easier to spend your life on purchasing things that you think you want than in learning about your own mind. Your mind is your own enemy until you get to know it.