Can you love without being sexual?

The straight answer is: YES. As a matter of fact, non sexual love is way deeper than any form of physical pleasure.
How is it expressed? As close or as distant as you would like to be to a person, it could be expressed through the body or through feelings transmitted through the eyes or even through feelings transmitted through thoughts.

As “impossible” as the above description may seem, it is completely possible.

In a “normal” relationship, closeness is expressed through sexuality. The problem with that is that there is an inherent conflict with feelings coming from the soul (spiritual nature) and pleasure experienced through the body. Any form of physical pleasure is dualistic in nature, meaning that suffering will be experienced with the same intensity of pleasure. Moreover, physical pleasure creates an immediate response in our consciousness. That response is expressed as “possession” of that which is “loved.”

Please see the contradiction. Something which is really loved, cannot be possessed. Physical “love” entails a dependency which is proportional to the amount of feelings towards another person. Jealousy, insecurity and hate/love emotional outbursts are the sign of physical “love.”

Basically, sexuality creates a “bond” or dependency towards another if there is any feelings of closeness in between. There is a mixture of physical bondage with spiritual feelings.

The problem becomes even greater as most individuals do not know what spiritual love is. For most love means the experience of lust (for another body) combined with emotional attachment...then, if sexual pleasure is added into the mix, the result is confusion.

Love. Real love is related with feelings. Feelings are of spiritual nature alone. Love is beyond duality. Love doesn't give pleasure nor pain. Love is completely fulfilling in itself without anyone's approval or disapproval. There is no possibility to experience “real” love unless we separate ourselves from lustful sexuality and its bondage of attachment. Otherwise, the physical “urges” will take precedence over spirituality since most individuals have not been trained in spiritual practices.

This means that for the immense majority of people, the second chakra will take precedence over the fourth one (heart) as most individuals express themselves through the lower chakras only ( Third and
below) rather than using the 4th (heart) and above.

Physically speaking men and women express duality and the search for completion, for unity. Both energies should be complementary of each other, however; that is not the case in a high percentage of individuals. That is why, usually relationships are set up with one person above the other, a dominant and a passive one. That is way out balance, not complementary.

Physically speaking, women have greater capacity of sexuality than men. This fact was studied by Taoists. Their answer to the problem was for a man to retain its semen for all sexual relationships and to be able to release that energy at will in limited occasions. This requires training. The aim in this Taoist type of sexuality is to “satiated women” and for men to gain subtle energies through sexuality.

The idea of men having several partners then, became part of the Taoist system. It is important to note, that this method became very important for the Chinese “higher ups” for they used to have many wives and therefore, their vitality was suffering tremendously by releasing precious energy every time with every partner.

Nowadays, the issue is still there. This Taoist method has its problem as well. Since it deals with “techniques” of pleasuring a sexual partner (duality,) spiritual love is out. By placing all importance on the sexual, pleasurable aspect and techniques; spiritual love, non-dual love is forgotten.

Celibacy is the path to experience fulfillment, detachment and deep love from the heart. Unfortunately, this path is not for everyone, for it requires more than anything; sensibility to beauty and a deep development of feelings which not everyone has taken the time to develop.

Real love has nothing to do with “sweaty passion.” It has nothing to do with “noisy pleasure.” It has nothing to do with criminal lustful eyes or killing the self for the sake of pleasure.

Real love is experienced as care, tenderness, understanding and constantly nurturing a relationship... of course, the keyword is "constantly"....